Two Blue Crabs

Hello fellow internet people. As you probably have been wondering: Where have I been. Well of recent my life hasn't been that exciting... Mostly full of unwanted drama that I can't really help. It follows me like a bunch of creepy pedophiles. That probably wasn't the best comparison. Goes to prove I've been reading too much two blue crabs. Other than the slight drama and amazingness of every day ending in me smacking my face on another glowstick. I've been actually pretty good. HARD TO BELIEVE HUH! Well fuck you. I kid the person reading this.

Anyway, not even sure as to why I am posting on here being as nothing exciting has happened in my life except for this lovely photo that I found on two blue crabs:

I love it cause it is so WTF and so LAWL all at the same time. It's amazing what the small stupid shit in life can do to make you forget about people that are complete douche bags to you for no reason at all. Like those stupid girls at school I swear. Honestly... I don't get how they can say they didn't steal when you were sitting their with them watching them do it. People are so right when they say cosmetologists are as stupid as rocks.

Off of that subject, I will hopefully be doing something exciting soon. I'm hoping to get bottlecaps this weekend. If anyone knows what those are kudos to you. Other than that I'm doing great, even though a mast majority of people would say I'm completely out of mind. How would they know, just like the rest of society to judge off of the outside display. What goes on inside is what you should really be fearing. For when it comes down to the full moon, the people that know me best know to scream: GTFO! GTFO! as they run in fear of their lives. Lol that is how I would like to see it at least.

Well that was todays blog thanks for taking the time to read a TRULY HAPPY BLOG.

Anonymous

I'M IN BFE!!!

Hello Internet, What the hell is going on here! No I'm serious, is it just cause the new moon is coming out that everyone is acting so off lately? I mean this week has been crazy. Apparently Marcus is mad at me for driving to West Wendover which sounds kinda stupid. Vanessa and I kinda just joked around about driving to Magna to go to Suicide Rock... I mean really guys, If I were to kill myself I would never jump. I'm deadly afraid of heights... You would have to push me off, and that would immediately mean you commit murder. Yay! So anyway... there is apparently something wrong with me. Again I have decided this and it's not everyone else. Why would everyone ignore me all of a sudden if it was them. I mean like everyone does this! lol I don't even know anymore.

So today will be a short blog as well. Basically I went to school and we all know how that goes. After school Vanessa came and picked me up. Basically she asked me where I wanted to go and I was like... Magna? Lets drive out to Magna. I don't know what caused me to want to do this, but I find it to be a relaxing drive. After following 3500 South until it ended... somewhat? We decided to turn left and head torward I-80. After thinking a bit she said lets go left... Let's go see the Great Salt Lake. Which turned into: Let's go to Tooele to see my friend. Which turned into: Let's go to Reno... as you can guess then ended with: Let's hit the border and head back.

So as we drove we called a bunch of people and told them about how we are going to Nevada. It was amazingly bamf. I have to say. It's a very windy and boring drive. Though I have to say at the same time is quite entertaining. Especially once you hit the Salt Flats. People write shit with the stones... and there are two random, real trees out there. If you read ParenthesisX's blog you will see the amazing Salt Flats Christmas Tree.

Anyway so we finally ended up at West Wendover, got gas, got food and drove back. Anything that happened after that is basically boring and nothing really happened. Thanks for reading.

VogueXTC

The only photo here that is edited was the photo of me. The only thing I did to the nature photos was add my watermark. So I hope you enjoy... or not.

I Like Your Shoes... Wanna Fuck?

Hello Internet, today I have to say was really boring. At the same time exciting in a way. It makes me wonder though... Are you really that bipolar, and even more so than me? Also, you may be wondering if you are reading this... Why did you block your blog? Well my grandma read it and bitched me out. I honestly feel like I can't do anything right around her. Anyway, I'm going to keep this introduction pretty short today.

Today was naturally pretty boring. I sat around with Vanessa then with Tamsen pretty much all day. I have to say I really love Tamsen. She may be young, but she is the awesome sauce of life. It was funny because she works at Golden Tan, and she got me a free birthday tan! Happy Un-Birthday to me! I have to say today was my first day tanning and I already think I am addicted. Though I am now burnt as hell and what not. It was way worth it. Then when Tamsen was getting ready to leave work she got her keys stuck in the door. It had to be one of the funniest things ever! I finally helped her lock up, but we swore we had to spend the night there.

After we left Golden Tan, We went back to Tamsen's house and kinda chilled there. Took some amazing photos of me being anorexic and ugly. lol new inside joke as well as I like your shoes... added by wanna fuck. Though we just say I like your shoes. If we go right into the wanna fuck part then things get complicated. So we keep it short and simple and hope you already know... Awright.

Well that was my day. Nothing truly exciting. Sorry that I had to make the blog private. I'm hoping this can be a temporary thing.

VogueXTC

I was trying to be an anorexic ugly bitch in these photos. Please let me know if I accomplished this:

Also, Tamsen and I laughed so hard when we were on my Myspace app. It was giving me a choice to delete Tony's Myspace Albums. O.O

Hanging By Some Strings Bitch...

Hello Internet, as I sit here trying to write this damn post I'm getting massacred with fucking twenty people talking to me. As of right now I don't want to talk to anyone. I don't even know why I started talking to all these people, but now I'm really irritated just like earlier today. Moving on from that subject I've decided to make weekends two parters because I am really never home to write my blog on Saturday and it ends up being posted on Sunday. Which is very irritating as well. So onward noble steed!

April 17, 2010:

As all Saturdays I have to wake up and go to school, which in my opinion is way lame. I have explained this before. Though I did get to spend my lunch with a friend of mine named Sally. I have to say she is one of my favorite people there to talk to. I can share almost anything with her and she has an answer. Basically she just listens to me, I need more people like this in my life honestly.

Then I get a text from Dana asking me to take her to the costume shop and how it closes at six. My school doesn't end until five and I told Tony that he and I would hang out. This is a dilemma that will be discussed below. Anyway so I left school early, picked up Dana and Marcus and took them to the costume shop where they didn't even find what they needed. Told me to drive to Pib's where then Tony calls Dana and asks if they wanted to hang. It's just really stupid, cause he says to me that he is too tired to hang out then calls them. It's utter bullshit in my opinion. Anyway so we finally leave Pib's and Tony meets us at Dana's where then we go to some Japanese restaurant. It was actually quite funny. Though I don't really remember much of all that went down.

After going to eat, everyone but me decided to go to Walmart. I hate Walmart so I was just like: Fuck this shit I'm sitting in my car. For whatever reason though Tony wanted me to come. I honestly do not understand him lately. I need ANSWERS, FUCKING ANSWERS PLEASE! He sat with me for awhile and talked with me. He tells me the same shit over and over, then says we will finish this talk later. He told me that two weeks ago, that talk is still not finished. Though I'm getting to the point where I ask myself why should we even talk. He see's right though me, he reads me like a book. I'm just to the point where I give up. Anyway the basic concept of this is he said: We will get coffee tomorrow, just you and me. We will finish our talk then.

So after everyone went to Walmart, we met back up at Dana's where both Tony and I lost our keys. It must have been exciting to watch us walk around aimlessly looking for our keys. Tony had to go home, I just wanted to go pick up some lights so I could get good at freehand glowsticking. It kinda made me mad that he blamed me for stealing his keys though. I told Marcus that if I found my keys that I would probably hide them until I found mine, but in all honestly if he asked for them I would have given him his keys. We did eventually find our keys, and I got my lights. lol Dana rode on my car not in it. It was pretty bamf, I'm not going to lie.

Other than that I passed out, and woke up to Rugrats and fucking Marcus staring at me... it was scary. So that was Saturday for ya.

April 18, 2010:

Today was an okay day. I woke up at 6:39 to have Tony text me morning. He hasn't done this in a long while. I think the last time he did this is when we were together. In all it's again very confusing and really threw me off guard. He's really good at this, just saying.

So I finally woke up around one, sat around for a bit, woke Dana and Marcus up at three. Asked Tony if he still wanted to get coffee and his answer was probably not. Which we all know that means no. Though I do feel bad that his dad is in the hospital. I really do wish his family the best of luck, because I'm crazy and I care about people THAT much. Idk, but Dana went out to eat with her family and left Marcus and I at the house. Where Marcus calls Tony and says, "Lets hang breh" and Tony is all like: Yeah. So I picked up Tony and took them both to Coffee Garden. Where I bought Tony the coffee I said I would. We all just kinda sat around and talked until Tony saw Hilary. Lol I felt so bad for her when he got her number. I honestly do not feel bad for what I said. In all honesty I wish there was a girl when Tony came into my life to tell me it's a trap. Life would be so much easier for me right now.

Then I took Marcus and Tony to Liberty Park where they had the drum circle. I have to say it was pretty fun for the short while I was there with Tony. I saw Devin whom I have not seen in a month. I was totally psyched to see him. So we all kinda just hung out when all of a sudden Tony says to me: Hey I'm riding back with these guys. To me that was a big FUCK YOU to the face. I buy him coffee, and he basically slaps me in the face. In my opinion I'm a dumbass. I'm that dog that gets fucking kicked in the teeth everyday, but I keep coming back for more in hopes that my owner will treat me with respect. lol what was I thinking. Oh and my friends reading this, you can tell me to get over it and tell me to stfu all you want, but this is how I feel on the situation and it's not going to change unless he keeps up with his word or I get so fucking angry and just leave.

Anyway after Tony said that I immediately told Marcus that we were going and that's just what we did. I left and took Marcus home, packed my shit and called up Lex. Where then Lex and I drove right back down to Liberty Park and hung out with even more people I haven't seen in a month. These people are: Alex, Bubbles, Casey, Ryan, and ETC. I was soooo happy to see these guys. I missed them a lot, but don't really see them anymore cause of most of the group not liking me so much.

Anyway after that I came home, where once again I lay here posting my blog. Thanks again for reading.

VogueXTC

Zombie Apocalypse

Hi Internet, apparently this man on my iTunes gets it poppin. lol This is all after downloading a 30 minute mix of Excision and Datsik. I have to say this is my new favorite thing to do. I don't listen to it cause I like it. I mean I really do like Gabber and Dubstep, but it's a lot more entertaining to play this shit really loud in parking lots and watch people walk past you all pissed off and shit. I don't know how many times today I was asked to turn my music down cause it was bothering someone. In my opinion they didn't have to listen, but I go to school with a ton of annoying girls that complain too much. Well that is what they do best right? Woman complain, thats all they are really good for. lol For a woman I'm a pretty sexist bitch. Well onto my short blog for today.

I went to school as normal and took a test. I have to say for not even being there for half of the chapter 95% is an amazing score. I'm just saying, after the test though I did some school work. I got five out of ten cornrows done, which compared to what I normally do that is pretty good. I'm honestly surprised that I'm not still sitting there being as how freaking slow I am at everything.

After school Vanessa came and picked me up where we got coffee, and Cafe Rio. We went down to a coffee shop called the coffee garden and they aren't actually too bad. Coffee is pretty cheap and it's very artsy I really like it there. Then we went to Cafe Rio and ordered some food. Nothing really exciting here, though on the way back to Sandy we had a discussion. I had talked to her about how I knew that Tony was pregnant the whole time... though it had to be Marcus's kid cause between them and their gay ass bromance came me. I'm the cross between the two of them I swear! Even Vanessa claims this to be utterly true.

Well also while driving back Vanessa told me how she is getting shooting classes so she can protect herself from the Zombie Apocalypse. For me I have to definitely facepalm this idea. First off I am sick of people saying I am crazy. I unfortunately do not believe in zombies, or the zombie apocalypse. That my friend is crazy, and most of my moms side I guess believe that zombies are real. I'm thinking what a fucking joke, am I the only normal one here. I sat with my mom explaining to her that zombies are not real. She is convinced that the old voodoo burial rituals make zombies. I have myself researched this topic and that is not how it is done. People back in the day would get really sick and be mistaken for dead people, so when they would bury them, they buried them with a special potion or what not that when these people woke up from a deep sleep that they would push themselves out of their graves and walk around in a stupor. I am embarrassed to have such family at times.

After hanging with Vanessa I kinda just went home. I haven't been really myself lately and I was really tired. So those who complain that there is way to much to already, I'm sure you are loving these short blogs. Anyway thanks for reading my blog and before I say night: I have bruises from yesterday and I blame you Marcus! You should have just let me seen your strings mister!

VogueXTC

You and Me Could Write A Rad Bromance...

Hello Internet, and your in for a treat today. Just kidding! Did I get you hopes up? I hope not. So as we all know I start off my blog with something random and off subject, but at the same time ties into shit? I don't know your defiantly asking the wrong person here. Anyway, out of all days I realized that I am really lonely. This is kinda how I felt back in January. I was like fuck this shit! I'm going to go do something with my life! Let me tell you that is never a good idea. I do shit with my life and I am back to square one. Well more like negative square six, but hey who would even know about that except me. I mean I'm the Queen of horrible things gone wrong in this motherfucker! Anyone who knows me well enough can tell you. That nothing literally goes right in my life EVER! Anyway enough with my pointless ranting. I mean "I have one of those blogs that no one reads" right? lol That's what someone said today...

So I'm going to let you guess what I did this morning. What's that? Why yes I went to school, but I got my hair colored again. It really needed it desperately. So why not, though I did have everyone around me telling me to shave my head bald on one side and I'm like: No thanks. lol I was really trying to grow it out, but as Vanessa has said. I pulled a Britney Spears... I did cut all my hair off cause I was really depressed and had no idea what was going on. Guess what internet: it was all a misunderstanding! What did I tell you, I called it.

After school I kinda chilled at home for a bit. I really needed to touch up the blue in my hair. What really bothers me is when everyone says my blue is green. They are all like: Hey I really like your green streak. Is it real? I get offended by this as to my hair is BLUE! Get it straight people, learn your colors or just simply stop being so color blind all the time.

I eventually left the house to adventure with Vanessa. I picked her up at work and just decided to go to Greenhouse Coffee. We ordered Emma's with muffins. Let me tell you it was amazing! I'm sure some people are super jealous. You all know who you are. Then we met up with Marcus, Dana, and Tony at Apollo Burger. This is the first time I have seen Tony since we went to Greenhouse and what not. Which brings up another subject soon to be talked about below.

We eventually went back to Dana's where she took pictures of herself in cosplay. We all just kinda chilled, nothing ever really exciting. Though I did get to pull Tony aside and talk to him for a bit. As I said above: Everything turned out to be a whole misunderstanding. I guess he never did block me on MSN, and really wasn't ignoring me. Wow I feel like a douche for getting all upset for nothing. lol I truly thought I lost a friend and he was pulling a Griffin on me. Thumbs up for over reacting! Not really. To everyone that witnessed that over reaction. I'm sorry. lol I'll learn to keep my pants on this time. Anyway one thing that did bother me was the fact that my grandma has once again invaded my privacy and called Tony. I really do not appreciate her doing this, because she does this so often. It just upsets me that she has to do this. She complains that I do not talk to her, but yet she doesn't talk to me. How can I talk to someone that goes through my things and invades my privacy. I don't know I'm just saying...

I eventually took Vanessa back to her car and met up with Dana, because Marcus was too busy having a bromance with Tony. I'm utterly jealous of this bromance they have. I told Marcus though that our love will be stronger and I will win his love by buying him more. lol He's still convinced that our bromance doesn't exist cause I have boobies. Screw the boobs! Our love is real! lol I am really just kidding, but honestly Marcus if you are reading this... I am truly jealous.

When Marcus got back with Tony I ran outside to see Marcus and keep him from going inside. Which was lame that he still got in. So while waiting for him to come back out I stood around with Tony and watched him freehand. He's amazing at it. One day I will be that good... I don't know another thing I'm utterly jealous about. It's odd though I've been having a lot of flashbacks, especially around Tony. I'm guessing it had a lot to do with maybe how he sent me through a bad trip or something. I cannot really explain it, though I can say I do not like flashing back. It makes all these stupid memories and shit black me out. There are times I'll be driving and it's almost like I'm back in that memory. Like I black out literally for a couple seconds and all I see is that memory. Not the road, which is kinda important. Though Marcus finally came out and joined in with his stringing. Then Dana came out took some pictures and what not while I wrote a poem. Which I will post below. Though I can honestly say I have never felt so lonely in life until tonight. I have a lot to think about because I'm dumb as Marcus would say... Then laugh... Who's laughing now bitch! Just kidding.

I came home a bit early today which is okay. I really do not mind in fact I'm thinking about playing some video games when I am done doing this. I bought Final Fantasy XIII and haven't even really played it. I mean Devan has played more than I have and he doesn't even own a playstation, which is really sad.

Anyway, I had a pretty good day. I'll see how my night goes, hopefully I can get to sleep. Who knows though. Thanks for reading! Also tell me what you think about this poem posted below.

VogueXTC

Tainted Souls

Cover your eyes young one,

the darkness is too bright.

Now sleep my young one,

as I carry you to the light.

Awaken your body,

shut down your soul.

Awaken your eyes,

go to sleep as a whole.

I shield you from destruction,

for the world is not full of bliss.

It's not as innocent as you think,

and when it's gone it's you I miss.

So child close your eyes,

forget about your tainted past.

Darling please shade your eyes,

Because nothing ever lasts.

Also before I forget. Tony bit me and it really hurt... Here is the proof to his assault on me... He did say sorry, kiss it better, then give me a hug... so I guess it's okay.

R.I.P Jeff (My Hair)

Hello internet, please do not get upset with me about yesterdays post. I know it sucked, I was in a horrible mood and really in no position to be talking about my god awful life. Like how I creepily stalk people. I kid about stalking your house, but really... I'm watching you. lol Thanks for all that really do put up with me. You guys are amazing!

So this morning was a little ruff for me. Especially since last night wasn't such a good night for me at all. Based off of my utter dislike for life and all living things, whatever. You basically get the point that I am a misanthrope and I hate humanity. In other words I woke up got dressed and went to school. I didn't even eat that is how much of a bad mood I was in. Anyways, school was alright, I chopped all my hair off. If that is good in anyway...

After going to school I went to my moms house to pick her up and go to dinner. Her and I go to Shanghai Cafe here in Salt Lake City occasionally. I have to say I really like going there. It was a great place to go when I was a vegetarian. Only because they serve really amazing vegetarian food there. So my mom and I went there and decided to go to Liberty park after. It's sad to say I don't really remember much about going there. I just remember the name and the river fountain thing they have there. It was nice walking around and having my mom tell me about the things her and I used to do there when i was younger. Very refreshing I have to say.

After seeing my mom I went over to Lex's for a bit to smoke some hookah. Nothing really interesting happened there. Though when I was done there I did meet up with Marcus for a bit. He and I just talked about shit. I think it's awesome that he finds me amusing. A lot of people find me to be obnoxious, but not him. I don't know it's a bromance thing. lol I'm still trying to convince him that our bromance is the real thing. Anyway I didn't say very long before I had to go home. Thus again I am there now writing.

Again thanks for reading, below is a new photo for my portfolio.

VogueXTC

Intervention

Hello internet, whats up? Today I want to talk about something very important at the moment. I hope my friends and what not do read this one. This will probably be one of the most down to earth blogs I will write and not only that... This blog is my way to let at least a little of my emotion be put out. Call me dramatic if you must, but please, please listen to me for once. I've been begging for days. A lot of the time I feel like a insect with light around you. I should stay away cause you may end up killing me, your definitely bad for my health. Though I am intrigued and I cannot stop hurting myself to get to something so good. Does that made sense?

I have never really been happy in my life. I can honestly say now, I've never really been happy. I regret almost everything I do. There has only been a couple times in my life where I have been this low to the point I'm crying ever few minutes or so... One was living with my father, I don't want to get into detail with that. Second was my car accident which fucked me up completely... I did hit my head pretty hard on the drivers side window during impact.

Anyway this is todays blog, thanks to my supportive friends for putting up with me and my stupid blog.

Today was a pretty normal day to start off with except I woke up feeling like I had been run over by an 18 wheeler. My body didn't want to move a muscle, let alone get out of bed to go to school. Everyday this activity has become harder and harder to do. I barely get rest and when I do I wake up feeling like shit, mostly cause I was dreaming of him again. Anyway I woke up and went to school until one where I came home, ate food, and immediately went to bed. This is where I had played F.E.A.R for an hour or so. After doing that I took a nice long shower.

This shower I have to say took about 45 minutes. Then after that I went right back to bed. I have no motivation to even dress myself. I have to say it took me 4 hours to get ready. This includes makeup, hair, and clothes. As you can imagine that is amazingly ridiculous... I finally did get those things done though, got in my car and drove out to Magna. Which honestly is only a 30 minute drive or less.

I met up with Dana at the Magna library where she helped me find Chris's house. Which he was so happy to see me bearing the gift of a new keyboard. I have to say his typing was nearly impossible to read it was really bugging me. So, I helped him set up his new keyboard and what not until I finally dropped Dana and Chris off at Dana's house. Where I continued on my own adventure...

This is where things start to get really complicated.

I started driving down to see Mikey who lives in Downtown Salt Lake. I figured what would it hurt to see other people. It may actually help me forget about him. So, that is just what I did... I went and saw Mikey. Now he is a pretty cool guy. He's good looking and funny, he has it all. He and I loaded up the hookah and smoked for a bit. Things were going well until he started to kiss me. Then the thoughts of him started pouring back into my head. All those: memories that shouldn't even exist... They all came crashing down. I felt so bad for Mikey because he seems like he really likes me. It's just the thoughts of Tony running though my mind with him is not a good thing. All of a sudden I'm realizing that I shouldn't be there. My body basically just shut down and every move he tried to make after that ended with me pushing him away and telling him to stop.

This reminds me of Tony so much... I thought maybe this is what it was like for Tony. Then I realize again that my heart is broken. I do not say that cause he broke up with me. I could have continued being his friend. It's just the immaturity of blocking me on every account he has open, ignoring me texts of apologizes, then posting how he has met this amazing girl that he has spent all day with. Then thinking I used to be her. It's just retarded, I want this to stop, but I don't know what to do except to blow my brains out. That WOULD make the thoughts stop.

In all honestly I wish there was something I could do about this, but there isn't. My heart breaks knowing that he dislikes me so much that he has to run away from me. As Dave has said to me before: Do not disappear that is taking things the easy way out. Well Dave if I disappeared would this hurt as much as it does now?

Anyway I finally left Mikey's house and decided to go to Dana's to pick them up and go to McDonald's where I basically told them everything about todays blog. It's nice to know that I have such great friends though that do listen to me and make me laugh when I need it. (This is said honestly with no sarcasm). You guys are truly great and I'm happy to call you guys my friends.

I finally pulled into Dana's driveway when I broke down. Well I broke down laughing and crying hysterically in McDonald's, but I finally had a BREAKDOWN. I discussed my feelings on what is going on and how I wish Tony could just forgive me, so we can stop fighting, and just start off fresh. No I do not mean: Let's get together again (because I'm not sure I could.) Basically I just want him to come back and be a friend. I don't see this happening for awhile though. He's cut me off from all communication. Though I hope we can have a conversation to just clear things up. I'm almost convinced all of this is one big misunderstanding. He just wont give me the time of day to help him understand.

Well that was pretty much my day. I fell into some deep depression for reasons I don't understand, I'm numb and have shut down completely. Hopefully tomorrow will be better. Thanks for reading this retarded post and dealing with it. You are the bomb internet people!

VogueXTC

Epic Music To The Death...

Hello internet, yet again. Today will be a two parter because partially I am really lazy. Not only that, but I don't feel good. In fact I feel like shit, and not worth anyones time. Theres these times in my life when I realize that I have fucked up the worst way possible. It's seems like it's been one of those days for 2 months. If you have ever had something that made you happy in your life you will know what I am talking about. Remember having your favorite T-shirt, but you wore it so much that it eventually became unwearable? lol then your mom throws it away and it's kinda gone forever? Then you buy another shirt, but it's never the same as the first one. Yeah that's exactly how I feel today. I feel like I've lost a part of me somewhere down the road. For the last few weeks I regret entirely. Now that my introduction is complete and was not as funny as normally lets start with April 11, 2010.

Today I woke up at Dana's, had quite the interesting night. I fell asleep watching War of the Worlds and woke up with the memories of odd dreams. I wont go into complete detail on my dream, but basically I had a dream that I was in Seattle with Dana and Marcus. It was just us there and things were going fine until my world just became a huge storm. There was just a huge fucking hurricane and there wasn't really anywhere to go. I was outside and alone. I have no idea where everyone went. So while looking for shelter I had started to walk down some steps. That's where I saw Tony. Also where I had woke up at 8 in the morning with amazing inspiration to write. Anyway, I haven't really slept well in a couple of days.

After getting up I was kidnapped by Dave. He took to me to McDonalds and we just sat and talked for awhile. It's always nice to talk to him, I believe he is the only one to really understand me. After that we went to his Uncles house for awhile while he worked on his car. They were basically making sure it was safe to drive to Virginia in. Which brings up another subject as of Dave is leaving to go to Virginia. I'm happy for him, but I really will miss him a ton. He's the closest friend I have, and when he is gone I don't know who I'm going to turn to anymore. Though we do have fun times, like when he turns on FFVII music and I have no idea where it's from. IT SOUNDS SO FAMILIAR! WHAT VIDEO GAME COULD HAVE SUCH EPIC MUSIC! lol I guessed freaking Lion King (facepalm).

Eventually Dave took me home so I could pick up my car and go back out to Dana's. Which she wasn't even there. I ended up driving to Greenhouse Coffee here in Salt Lake. It was so funny when I got there though. She was like, "I missed you!" and we just went on how we missed each other after not seeing each other for maybe 3 - 4 hours? It was funny though. Tony was there and I didn't really talk to him much. He's gotten very distant from me lately. More on that in a bit... Anyway we played Indian Poker. I was so bamf at that game I have to say. After that I walked off on my own to buy some cigarettes. I've been smoking more lately, I'm just so stressed and upset. In other words I'm distressed. I CAN BE SAVED NAO? Well, by the time I got back they were leaving so I got in my car and started driving as fast as I could. When we got to a stop light though Dana ran out and got in my car. It was so funny, I was like : that is not awkward at all! Greenhouse was fun though.

We went back to Dana's where we all just kinda sat around doing our own thing for awhile. Until Tony left... and God when he did it got boring as hell. We joked around about how we should invite someone over and that would fix everything. So I was like hey let's call Alice! That's exactly what Dana did too. I don't know, we all tend to do weird shit when we are together.

The rest of the night was pretty boring. I played drawing wars with Marcus for a bit, then we watched Dana play some video games. For whatever reason Dana left to go on a walk. I guess she wasn't feeling very good and what not. While she was gone Marcus and I watched some TV and while flipping though channels we saw the end of this commercial where these guys were playing golf. Though the one guy was bending over and yells, "WRONG HOLE"... God did we laugh so hard. Well after watching TV for awhile I passed out on the couch and that's pretty much my night...

So for April 12, 2010...

Today I woke back up at Dana's this morning. For whatever reason I've had a hard time finding my keys. Though her Dad needed to move his car. Out of all times why did today have to be a day I couldn't find my stupid car keys. I finally did find them and move my car, but it took me an hour because I am blind as hell! I finally got those guys to wake up though, I told them there was coffee. Works every time, we didn't go get coffee because they wanted Apollo Burger instead. I have to say that was pretty good even though I couldn't finish the whole thing.

After that we picked up Dana's friend Felisha and went to the park to take some pictures. I will have to post those soon. Whenever Dana posts them... I should be saying. Anyway there really wasn't much adventures there. After going to the park we went back to Dana's and just kinda chilled and talked. Enjoyed each others company. Which I had to say was pretty relaxing.

After awhile I started to get really upset. There has been a lot of things on my mind of lately and it's really bringing me down. All I can say is I fuck everything up, I mean everything! So I went and loaded my hookah, and Marcus came out with me to smoke. It was a good time I have to say. We basically just goofed off with good music and blew hookah smoke into and onto shit. lol we even did that *wink wink* hookah trick... lol it was so funny. I'm sorry, but you have to be there to really get it.

After that we all went on a driving adventure, got some ice cream and drove to take Felisha home. All that happens after this is pretty much boring so I will sum it up really quick. I took Dana and Marcus home, packed up my shit really quick. Drove home and cleaned my room. To where I am now writing this blog once again. Sorry I missed out on yesterdays post, but it's all covered here...

Well I'm going to get back to downloading F.E.A.R. YAY! Below is my new poem Motionless check it out. If you like it please comment.

VogueXTC

Motionless

Her body pressed close to the cold ground below.

While under sheets of guilt she had sewn before.

Tangled in regret, twisted in her own lies.

Laying motionless with tears in her eyes.

Her brittle body breaks as you exhale to speak.

Your words like daggers, like eggshells below her feet.

Drag her by the chokechain, and giggle while you do.

For once in your miserable life, you may follow through.

Poison me once more with your intoxicated kiss.

Though the story never ends, unless with an unexpected twist.

She still lay motionless, the blood spread unto the floor.

Though you still pull her close, just begging for her once more.

PWNING SOME N00BS...

Hello Internet, yet again we meet face to face for an EPIC battle of epicness? Fuck, I have no idea what that was... I feel lame yet again. Thanks Internet! Anyway, so I was thinking: I'm pretty sure that I have either lost my mind or that my mother has dropped me on my head several times as an infant. Either way, I'm not all here. As I have said before, I feel like the real Alice in Wonderland almost 90% of time. Most of my life has been one huge ball of utter confusion. Most importantly though I thought I would start off by saying: Yes I like to make fun of myself. What better way, it makes people laugh right?

Well as stated in yesterdays post I do go to school on Saturdays, because that is what us hairstylists in training do. We waste all our day (8 hours) in school, while our friends are out dicking around and frankly it kinda pisses me off. I'm really sorry, but I would like to have fun for once! Anyway as always I did shit today. I got another four credits and I felt pretty successful in life. Well that is half of the required credits that I need for the day, but it literally took me all day to roll a perm cause I have the attention span of a 4 year old. Which to put that into perspective is about (if your lucky) 30 minutes.

During my lunch break I smoked hookah. While doing that we were giving the sex talk to Hannah and that had to be the funniest thing ever. Not only that but I have major skills at smoking hookah *wink wink* if you all know what I mean. (new inside joke, I will never be explaining this one except in person). Continuing on with my day...



My friend Lex came in for a haircut at 4:30... Yes I wanted to kill him, because school gets out at around 5. Mind I was on a 30 day leave and hell... It takes me forever to do a haircut anymore cause everything looks WRONG about that persons haircut. Lucky for me it was well worth it. I got a 10 dollar tip that basically led to better things though out my day.

After cutting Lex's hair he had picked me up from my house and drove me to Dana's. Which is pretty awesome. No, I did not get my car back today. Hopefully I will have my car back by tomorrow. More on that tomorrow. Back to what I was saying: I showed up at Dana's where I was like, "I got 10 bucks! Lets go play some F.E.A.R!". This seemed like a very good idea until we didn't have a ride and ended up walking I swear a mile and a half. Now let me give you the details to this walk...

Today I decided to wear my favorite sandals, mind I mention these sandals are not for walking or standing for long periods of time. As you can imagine my feet hurt like hell and my legs and ass burned more than a person with an STD. Lol I did complain the whole time, because I am female and that is what most of us do. We annoy you will our constant complaining on basically everything.

Well Dana, Marcus, and I ended up finally at the Hunter Library. This is where Dana called Tony, while I was calling Dave to ask him to save me. We all understand the circumstances, well I hope you do. I don't really want to talk too much on that subject. So, Tony picked us up and took us to GameStar where we played an hour of F.E.A.R. I actually really liked it for a shooter (which I'm terrible at!) Though with a little Drop Dead Gorgeous playing in the background I got used to the game pretty quick. From what Tony says I do better than most beginners. I guess that's a good thing if I'm good at running around and shooting people?

After the game Tony ran back to get his computer to show the guy at the computer repair (GameStar) store. While he was off doing this I went to the gas station to pick up some food. I was starving my ass off. Well Chris went with me and then left me there all alone. I swear I was going to cry. There was this scary black lady who was complaining that her Black and Mild was stale and that it was complete bullshit. I was expecting her to pull out her gun and shoot everyone cause her damn Black and Mild wasn't good enough... I was just hungry.

After that Dave Finally met up with us. Now to let you know a little about Dave. He is one of my closest friends. He and I pretty much talk about anything and everything, we barely hide anything from each other. Well you are probably thinking: Why don't you date him? Well I have, but I feel he and I work out much better as friends. So Dave met up with us and we hung out for a quick bit. Basically he and I just goofed off as Tony was getting something done with his computer.

After that I went to a theater in Magna called the Empress? (Is this correct guys?) Well, we went there to see an improv show. I have to say it was really funny and I would definitely go again. I wish I could do something like this in my life. I only say this because my life is one big improv show and I just throw shit out there. It usually makes people laugh or giggle. Soon after the show we took Chris back home, then soon after Tony took Dana, Marcus, and I back to their home. Where my night will probably still continue with adventures. I can almost guarantee this! I mean it is already fucking Sunday! I'm posting this shit on Sunday! Well I'll post the rest today... Cause it is Sunday. FML.

I rate Saturday a 4 out of 5. It was a great day and I hope to have more like these. Tomorrow should be interesting. I will hopefully be getting my car back. Finding a ride back home so I can leave home if that makes sense? Thanks for reading, and enjoy my recent formspring questions with answers!

VogueXTC

Why are you such a fat cunt?

I'm not sure... I try so hard every day to be a skinny one, but it just never really works out.

Do you realize how fake you are? or are you oblivious to the fact that stealing pictures and claiming that it's you in them is creepy? I'm so glad you don't live near me.

Do you realize how retarded you just sounded right there? All my photos are of me. At least the way current ones. I admit I love my photoshop. Shit though I thought everyone watched YouTube these days. I'm also glad I don't live near you... You seem like your not with it. (edit: that picture I just posted above was taken from my cellphone. So fake huh?)

Contract Me To Cut Your Locks

Hi internet, I'm only three days in and running out of clever things to start my blog off with. Honestly though I don't think I'm really that funny. Though sometimes I say things when I'm in a really bad mood and people find that fucking hilarious. For reasons I really cannot understand. Such as: I'd rather be fucked in the bum by flying monkeys, then talk to him again. Why is that funny? Oh, and Phil Collins... I wont stop crying cause things will not be alright. I've been alive for 19 years and something bad happens everyday. Though I see things as 10 good things are less than 1 bad thing.

So today was an interesting day. Started off with school again, was talking to my friend Megan about a guy friend of hers named Ben. Well Ben in my opinion is absolutely brilliant. In his blog he rants on about how Twilight is FAKE and GAY. Yeah he misspells some shit, but I have to say kudos to him for expressing his hate for that horrible piece of literature. Which makes me think... Why do people burn the bible when they could be making a better bonfire with Twilight books. Just saying guys.

Also I just now had another epiphany... I think I will start vlogging my blogs. Odd and interesting at the same time and I may get some views. I mean I'm good looking and I have great boobs. I fit the job description very well!

Back to my day...

So I went to school and actually did something today. I figure that I started school doing really well. I got 8 credits a day or more and slowly lost interest and motivation... meaning I was getting less credits everyday. I'm going to try and work up to at least getting 6 to 8 credits a day. Good news is I got 4, so I'm working slowly and achieving so much.

Then after school I came home for a bit and eventually met up with this awesome guy named Lex, in which he has "contracted me to cut his locks" (lol Xan cracks me up). He and I didn't do much being as I have to be home earlier for school, but we kinda just sat around talked about WoW and watched some YouTube. Then he took me to a gaming store to meet up with Dana. Gotta love that girl, she has the bluest hair ever. After that though I ended up coming home, and now I'm here writing this. Yay?

What is that internet? I haven't talked about Tony yet? You are very correct on this comment, I have not talked about him yet. Well if you want to know I wrote him a very long text in which I believe he has read and laughed at it or has ignored completely. Not sure, but as far as what Dana has told me... He told her to invite me to F.E.A.R night. Too bad I have school on SATURDAY. Yeah, what kind of school is this? Answer: Hair School. Anyway, things with Tony are very confusing and utterly annoying I'd rather just have him come to me then exhaust all energy I have on him. I've wasted enough time and breath on him that I'd rather just say FIN.

As to Friday I rate it about a 3... Not bad for a Friday. I have a lot to look forward to tomorrow. Such as a sleepover with Dana and hopefully I can take my awesome car. If not I will have a friend drop me off or teleport. Well talk to you all tomorrow!

VogueXTC

Transformercorns... Sorry We Have To Kill You...

Hello internet the date is posted somewhere on this page, just thought to let you know. Just in case if you were wondering when this post was made. Again though, who reads this except really creepy people and friends. Hopefully not too much family, they would be utterly disappointed in me. Anyway here is to another fun filled day with VogueXTC.

Today was very disappointing... Sometimes you wake up in the morning and your thinking, "Yeah, todays gonna be okay, lets text some people good morning." Worst fucking idea every guys, do not do it. You get people like Tony who say that your being dramatic cause you sent them the wrong text. Shit I was just trying to make a conversation. I'm sorry I said good morning. Don't you agree though, it's more dramatic to post what happened on the internet then to actually say good morning. BTW LEARN TO KEEP YOUR PANTS ON!

So I went to school and damn was I bored. I swear I have no motivation to brush my own hair let alone some lady's hair. I am sorry world. It's difficult when you've just gotten back from a 30 day leave. School is pretty much like... STAY AWAY FROM THE FRONT DESK. You have to be ninja or otherwise you have an appointment... I seriously ride the elevator more than the special kids. That is truly sad, let me tell ya. Anyway I basically went to school and sat around and did nothing. Except for when I got REALLY bored and started mixing acrylic with the competition liquid and then took that ball of acrylic after it hardened and placed that in acetone. Well until I started pouring the acrylic powder with the acetone and made a beautiful mess.

In all I made 2 dollars today...

After that I went home as normal and I was really disappointed... Nessa was supposed to kidnap me... but she had to work. Why does everyone have to work. It makes me not excited to have to tell people, "yo I'm at work". Which reminds me!

I got an email today from a... hm I don't even know who he is but he's some department of security of the USA and he wants in my juvenile record... He's like I want your disposition papers from this unreported arrest in 2005 and I'm thinking, "Are you serious... you want my juvenile records... HELL NO". Basically I'm arguing with this guy about how he can't decline me a job because of charges that have been long gone sealed when I turned 18. Which was in 2009... FAIL.

Anyway thats all that really happened today. Thursdays are not really that great. Neither are Fridays, so don't get you hopes up.

VogueXTC

Wow... I'm Getting Fat and Lazy...

Hello again fellow internet friends, in which I probably do not have being as I have a total of ZERO followers, no comments, and yes this is a run on sentence. Welcome to America, shit happens. Anyway, today was an interesting day as always. I woke up, went to school for a bit. I decided that I was bored and, well tried to leave until I realized my car battery yet again died on me... As you can imagine I was not a very happy little girl...

Other than that, I did eventually leave the house later that day and managed to steal back my amazing hookah! Yes, we kidnapped a hookah and I have to say I am very excited to have Barbie (my hookah) back into my lovely life. Now you ask: Who is we? I left with Xan who is a really good friend of mine and I've known him now for a little over a year. Let me tell you, time just goes by way to fast.

Anyway so we kidnapped my hookah drove around for a couple of hours and discussed some things. Like how he believes I am pregnant, and I don't. Even though there is a very high probability of that happening I doubt I am. I mean your not pregnant until you take the test right? So If I never take a pregnancy test... Then I was never pregnant. It works just trust me. So we talked for a bit, got some In and Out burger here in Salt Lake. Thats pretty much how that went. Just drove around forever in his amazing car and ate.

Now you are thinking: So what are you going to do with the hookah? Xan and I drove to my friend Tamsen's house. She is pretty much one of the most bamf people I know. I have to tell ya. We cleaned out my beautiful hookah and soon decided... I'm not going to leave it at Tamsen's house! I haven't smoked hookah in 3 days. I'm loosing my mind! So we set the hookah and what not in my purse and drove me back home. I can has hookah now?

Anyway, my day was pretty boring. Adventurous... but way boring in my opinion. Also, I'm way to fat and lazy to really look at those pictures I took. I'm hoping since tomorrow is Thursday and so awkward maybe I will take a look at my random: I'm driving my car down the freeway and taking pictures, pictures. Mhm...

Again, thanks for reading all of this if you have.

VogueXTC

Thoughts

So I was thinking... I believe this is starting to become a blog. MAY IZ BE FAMOUSEZ NAO?

Just kidding...

...but anyway. No I was thinking today about a lot of things. Which is pretty normal and a good sign. It means my brain is functioning perfectly fine and I have not completely lost my mind. So while I was on my adventures today I was thinking about you. I doubt YOU even read these and even so if you do that is really creepy I am just saying *cough cough* TONY *cough cough*. Really creepy dude...

Anyway I was thinking a lot on how he found my "through shadow" thing. I don't tell anyone, ANYONE about that. I mean I just told you, the internet, but your like 'wtf is through shadow? what does that mean'. Well exactly you wont really ever know because it's kinda a TOP SECRET, CONFIDENTIAL thing of mine and there wont be any explaining of this topic.

Anyway, I'm sitting in my car and telling him how I was going to just leave him (Mind this was 04/05/2010). That's when he is like 'oh I get it' and brings all that up... WTF ARE YOU DOING STALKING ME! I just wanted to bring that up... I'm not sure as to why, but eh, I needed to get that off of my chest.

Secondly, I'm still thinking about you. I'm very confused by you and very confused by me. I'm thinking 'Why is my heart broken? I barely know you.' This does not make the slightest sense to me, and if anyone has any clues please let me know. I doubt you will because who is going to want to read this, but still! Anyway, I'm thinking maybe if you gave me a chance, then maybe I would give myself a chance. I don't know how that makes any fucking sense, but it does to me.

Other than that let me tell you about my awesome adventure today. One: I had a huge fight with family only because I have a horrible potty mouth and I fight for my hookah... Damn no one understands how much I love that thing! Two: I went on a date? Was that a date? I don't know, free fucking coffee I will take it. Your wondering, 'okay well how did that go?" It was okay, I'm not sure if I would date the poor kid, because I am way too caught up in having the hots for Tony. Well... why, you ask. Well I feel like Tony really understands me. Like I can be myself and there is nothing I can do to scare the shit out of him. He's goofy and at the same time charming I don't UNDERSTAND IT'S PISSING ME OFF! In other words... I honestly don't know about this new kid. Three: I saw Tony today... and your thinking STFU ABOUT TONY ALREADY. So I wont talk much about what happened there. Basically I watched him do WoW raids for two hours. Pretty fucking boring, let me tell ya.

Well I have school tomorrow, cause thats what I was supposed to be doing today, but I already called in and that was not happening. Sorry guys .

Also before I go I took some pictures. I don't know if I'm going to post them. I'll look at them tomorrow when I have nothing better to do with my lonely life.

VogueXTC