Hello internet, yet again. Today will be a two parter because partially I am really lazy. Not only that, but I don't feel good. In fact I feel like shit, and not worth anyones time. Theres these times in my life when I realize that I have fucked up the worst way possible. It's seems like it's been one of those days for 2 months. If you have ever had something that made you happy in your life you will know what I am talking about. Remember having your favorite T-shirt, but you wore it so much that it eventually became unwearable? lol then your mom throws it away and it's kinda gone forever? Then you buy another shirt, but it's never the same as the first one. Yeah that's exactly how I feel today. I feel like I've lost a part of me somewhere down the road. For the last few weeks I regret entirely. Now that my introduction is complete and was not as funny as normally lets start with April 11, 2010.
Today I woke up at Dana's, had quite the interesting night. I fell asleep watching War of the Worlds and woke up with the memories of odd dreams. I wont go into complete detail on my dream, but basically I had a dream that I was in Seattle with Dana and Marcus. It was just us there and things were going fine until my world just became a huge storm. There was just a huge fucking hurricane and there wasn't really anywhere to go. I was outside and alone. I have no idea where everyone went. So while looking for shelter I had started to walk down some steps. That's where I saw Tony. Also where I had woke up at 8 in the morning with amazing inspiration to write. Anyway, I haven't really slept well in a couple of days.
After getting up I was kidnapped by Dave. He took to me to McDonalds and we just sat and talked for awhile. It's always nice to talk to him, I believe he is the only one to really understand me. After that we went to his Uncles house for awhile while he worked on his car. They were basically making sure it was safe to drive to Virginia in. Which brings up another subject as of Dave is leaving to go to Virginia. I'm happy for him, but I really will miss him a ton. He's the closest friend I have, and when he is gone I don't know who I'm going to turn to anymore. Though we do have fun times, like when he turns on FFVII music and I have no idea where it's from. IT SOUNDS SO FAMILIAR! WHAT VIDEO GAME COULD HAVE SUCH EPIC MUSIC! lol I guessed freaking Lion King (facepalm).
Eventually Dave took me home so I could pick up my car and go back out to Dana's. Which she wasn't even there. I ended up driving to Greenhouse Coffee here in Salt Lake. It was so funny when I got there though. She was like, "I missed you!" and we just went on how we missed each other after not seeing each other for maybe 3 - 4 hours? It was funny though. Tony was there and I didn't really talk to him much. He's gotten very distant from me lately. More on that in a bit... Anyway we played Indian Poker. I was so bamf at that game I have to say. After that I walked off on my own to buy some cigarettes. I've been smoking more lately, I'm just so stressed and upset. In other words I'm distressed. I CAN BE SAVED NAO? Well, by the time I got back they were leaving so I got in my car and started driving as fast as I could. When we got to a stop light though Dana ran out and got in my car. It was so funny, I was like : that is not awkward at all! Greenhouse was fun though.
We went back to Dana's where we all just kinda sat around doing our own thing for awhile. Until Tony left... and God when he did it got boring as hell. We joked around about how we should invite someone over and that would fix everything. So I was like hey let's call Alice! That's exactly what Dana did too. I don't know, we all tend to do weird shit when we are together.
The rest of the night was pretty boring. I played drawing wars with Marcus for a bit, then we watched Dana play some video games. For whatever reason Dana left to go on a walk. I guess she wasn't feeling very good and what not. While she was gone Marcus and I watched some TV and while flipping though channels we saw the end of this commercial where these guys were playing golf. Though the one guy was bending over and yells, "WRONG HOLE"... God did we laugh so hard. Well after watching TV for awhile I passed out on the couch and that's pretty much my night...
So for April 12, 2010...
Today I woke back up at Dana's this morning. For whatever reason I've had a hard time finding my keys. Though her Dad needed to move his car. Out of all times why did today have to be a day I couldn't find my stupid car keys. I finally did find them and move my car, but it took me an hour because I am blind as hell! I finally got those guys to wake up though, I told them there was coffee. Works every time, we didn't go get coffee because they wanted Apollo Burger instead. I have to say that was pretty good even though I couldn't finish the whole thing.
After that we picked up Dana's friend Felisha and went to the park to take some pictures. I will have to post those soon. Whenever Dana posts them... I should be saying. Anyway there really wasn't much adventures there. After going to the park we went back to Dana's and just kinda chilled and talked. Enjoyed each others company. Which I had to say was pretty relaxing.
After awhile I started to get really upset. There has been a lot of things on my mind of lately and it's really bringing me down. All I can say is I fuck everything up, I mean everything! So I went and loaded my hookah, and Marcus came out with me to smoke. It was a good time I have to say. We basically just goofed off with good music and blew hookah smoke into and onto shit. lol we even did that *wink wink* hookah trick... lol it was so funny. I'm sorry, but you have to be there to really get it.
After that we all went on a driving adventure, got some ice cream and drove to take Felisha home. All that happens after this is pretty much boring so I will sum it up really quick. I took Dana and Marcus home, packed up my shit really quick. Drove home and cleaned my room. To where I am now writing this blog once again. Sorry I missed out on yesterdays post, but it's all covered here...
Well I'm going to get back to downloading F.E.A.R. YAY! Below is my new poem Motionless check it out. If you like it please comment.
VogueXTC
Motionless
Her body pressed close to the cold ground below.
While under sheets of guilt she had sewn before.
Tangled in regret, twisted in her own lies.
Laying motionless with tears in her eyes.
Her brittle body breaks as you exhale to speak.
Your words like daggers, like eggshells below her feet.
Drag her by the chokechain, and giggle while you do.
For once in your miserable life, you may follow through.
Poison me once more with your intoxicated kiss.
Though the story never ends, unless with an unexpected twist.
She still lay motionless, the blood spread unto the floor.
Though you still pull her close, just begging for her once more.
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